this and that

I am such a terrible blogger! Thank you for grace. I have so many things I want to write about and get excited throughout the day thinking about sitting down to my blog and writing a post. Then life happens, and I get busy doing laundry, or washing the dishes, or taxi-ing my kiddos to and fro, and the day is gone, and I am worn smooth out. Maybe I'll learn how to just sit down and pen something short and sweet a few times a week. Well anyway, I appreciate this space...this part of the blogosphere where I can share my life, my family, my thoughts and dreams, my worries, my projects and my meals with you. I wish we could sit by the fire pit with a marshmallow and cup of coffee or glass of wine. Maybe some day we will! For now, I enjoy hearing from some of you every now and then as you take the time to drop a line or leave a comment.

Today we celebrated Luke's 9th birthday with some of our extended family. I cannot believe he is nine. He's so darn cute! We are blessed. I think he really liked his cake and cookies. I know he liked the chocolate frogs. He ate so many his stomach hurts, poor baby! I hope he felt special. I remember how my mom always made birthdays so special. I want that for my kids too. I feel like the past, well, five or so years, have been a blur. I hardly remember Cora being a baby. She will turn four at the end of March. Baffling! Anyway, I feel like I'm starting to see the end of the heavy fog through which I've been wandering. I hope I can focus more on the kids. They are growing so fast. I wish I could pull the brakes on this train and slow it down. There's so much we have to teach them, so many experiences we want them to know. I pray God will guide.



 I'm looking forward to week three of Hello Mornings! I'm doing the Abounding Hope study...a study of Job. It's so good. I'm also looking forward the Lent season starting Wednesday. What are your traditions? I hope to find something to use to share this season with the kids. I think it's so important. Well, off to bed for me. Hopefully I'll get that post written about my sweet Grandmama this week and share it with you. I have so much to say! :)

Nine

Our boy is nine today! Wow! Could it be that long ago I only had one little one at my heals and a swollen belly? I remember putting an "I'm the BIG sister" shirt on Carleigh to announce to our friends and family that there would be another little Dunnam running around. When the day arrived for Luke to make his debut, Kelvin had worked late into the night making deer sausage with his uncles and had just climbed into bed after his shower, completely exhausted. He kissed me goodnight and turned over to go to sleep. I don't think it was two minutes later I felt my water break. I told him what had just happened, and he said, "Do you know what time it is?" Unfortunately for my worn out man, we would head to the hospital about an hour later. We had a little time to rest once we arrived, but not much before the contractions started getting harder and our little boy bundle arrived. (I would be lying if I said I didn't care if we were having a boy or girl. I wanted a little man cub. Of course, I would have been totally pleased as punch had the ultrasound shown another little girl, but I was excited to hear the technician say, "Looks like we have a boy.") After Luke nursed intially he slept the rest of the day. That night, the nurse made me wake him up to feed him again. Kelvin's first time to change Luke's diaper was hilarious. I think Kelvin is still somewhat damaged by the whole experience of being sprayed by a baby boy, but he's starting to heal. ;)

The young wizard requested cinnamon rolls for breakfast.

 

At nine, Luke is into Harry Potter, bey blades, rip sticks, skate boards, gymnastics, soccer, tossing around a football, doing well in school, loving his dog, fishing, hunting, and picking on his sisters. He loves playing, loves God, and loves winning. Everything is a contest at this age. He is a delightful child and has a sensitive side opposite his spitwad spitting, practical joker side. He is boy through and through. He keeps us on our toes and doubled over laughing much of the time. I love this little man of mine.

 

Happy birthday, Lukester!

It still hurts

It hurts. Especially when you touch it. It's healing over, but it's still painful. It's not a gaping wound, flesh torn and bleeding everywhere. Now it's a dark purple scar that's slowly starting to fade into my skin tone. You can see it, but it's not quite as obvious to the unknowing onlooker. I thought it would get easier as the years pass, but it's not. It's just different. A day does not go by that I don't think of my sweet girl and wish things could have been different for her. I'm trying to learn, rest in His mercy and grace and continue to hope.

I’ll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—the feeling of hitting the bottom. (vs. 19-20 from The Message)

Then I remember something that fills me with hope.
The Lord’s kindness never fails!
If he had not been merciful, we would have been destroyed.
The Lord can always be trusted to show mercy each morning.
Deep in my heart I say, “The Lord is all I need; I can depend on him!”

Lamentations 3:21-24

March 1, 2006--February 1, 2010



Grandmama

 

Thank you for praying for our family. My sweet Grandmama passed away last week. She was such a saint. I will write more about her next week. Thank you for praying as we celebrate her life this weekend. Pray I don't bawl through the songs I'm supposed to sing. Thanks.

Hello Mornings!

During the summer, I was reading this post on Amanda's blog. I love her ideas. Anyway, in her post she talked about a challenge she took to get up early and spend time with God, plan her day, and exercise before her children woke each day...waking FOR her children and not To them. "Hmm," I thought. Then, the Holy Spirit started tugging on my heart and wouldn't leave me alone until I joined the challenge too. I don't like getting up early...at. all! But I started doing it. Some days were easier than others, but I was always blessed when I got up and spent time in the Word before the kids woke. Registration for the next challenge starts today. It's only open for a week, so don't delay too long. This time, I am a group leader. Would love for you to join me. We can hold each other accountable. Have a beautiful day!

     

Click on the box above and follow the directions to register. If you want to join my group, scroll down through the photos of all the loverly Accountablility Captains until you see my photo. I'm number 59.

                  

Broken down

I'm feeling a bit like my poor Yukon XL (Suburban)...everything is breaking down. Just like her, I want to run, I just need a new fuel pump and my electrical system needs replacing so I don't keep randomly blowing hot air as I go down the road. She's been a good mode of transportation for the past 8 years and 170,000 + miles, but I think it's time to trade her in for a newer model with less wear and tear. I think it's time to trade this overweight, out-of-shape body in for a newer, fitter model as well. Over the past week I've been thinking a lot about what I would like to do. I guess I won't get any fitter or feel any better by just thinking about it though, huh?

The past few days have been pretty dreary. Rain and cold. More rain and cold. (Oh, except for that day last week when it was almost 80 degrees. You never know what you're gonna get!) The rain and cold kind of reflect how I feel. Pretty drab. Winter is hard. It's such a reminder of loss and pain. I cannot believe that in just a few short weeks Emma will have been gone for three years. How is that possible? Her loss doesn't get any easier. Cora has been asking more frequently now when Emma will come back from Heaven. I so wish she had her big sister here and healthy. What precious playmates they would make. Oh, I'm sure they would have their fare share of bickering and fussing. But I know they would have so much fun too...Barbies, dolls, Candyland, tea parties, ballet and gymnastics. My heart hurts.

Thank you for your prayers for my Grandmama. Please continue to pray as the hospice nurse told my family to prepare for her last days. Altzheimer's has stolen my sweet Grandmama. We all had to say good-bye well before today. It's hard though, to have to let go of her completely. To say good-bye a second time. Thank you for keeping my mom, aunt and uncle in your thoughts and prayers as they prepare to let her go. Grandmama has done nothing lately but speak about her Savior, her precious Jesus. Her favorite thing to do the past few years was sing hymns (and the occasional Can-Can loud and proud in the grocery store. :) ) For her 80 birthday three years ago, I had the priviledge of visiting with her and singing with her for a few minutes. She remembered me for a moment. I will treasure the memory.

 

HaPpY New Year!

I hope y'all had a wonderful Christmas and fun New Year's Eve. We had a great holiday. Not sure if I mentioned we were blessed with the opportunity to purchase a piece of property not far from our old deer lease, but we closed on the sale in November. We headed up after Christmas for a few days, and Kelvin harvested the first buck off the Dunnam Ranch. :) We are pretty excited about our little piece of heaven in the hill country. We will put a small cabin on it but nothing huge or extravagant AT. ALL. There is no power or water, so we'll keep it simple with solar power and bring in water to fill a tank. We're looking for another lease in the area, because our place isn't really ideal for hunting. Looking forward to the planning and pinning that will surely take place over the nex year. :)

I feel just awful that I have been so behind on posting. I simply do not know where the day goes. Before I know it, the kids are in bed, I straighten up a bit, check a few emails and blogs,  and it's 10 p.m.! I hope to do better managing my time this year. I have several other goals including, but not limited to, cleaning (I mean throwing out most of the stuff) in every room of this house, painting, planting, growing, and losing. Growing in my faith and losing the extra pounds that found their way to my backside and belly are the two biggest goals of the year. I'm excited about another Hello Mornings Challenge, and I've at least tossed around several ideas as to how best to lose those extra pounds. I started this week by being more mindful of drinking water throughout the day and taking note of what I'm putting into my mouth. It's a lot. :( Tomorrow I will jump on the exercise train.

Also, will you please join me in praying for my sweet Grandmama? She has advanced Altzheimer's Disease and this week she has struggled with a really bad cold. Pray for strength for my mom and aunt as they care for her and peace for any future decisions they have to make. Thank you. Also, if you would keep my sister in your continued prayers. She just finished her halfway point of chemo treatments. She is so brave. I'm so proud of her. She feels awful until it's time for the next treatment. I know she is looking forward to spring when all of this will be over. Thank you for praying.

Have a beautiful week!